Showing posts with label male victimization. Show all posts
Showing posts with label male victimization. Show all posts

6 December 2016

PM Trudeau’s statement on violence against women and the Montreal Massacre: my thoughts

Following is the message I left online for Prime Minister Trudeau on his official government page at  https://pm.gc.ca/eng/connect :

I read the PM's statement today about the event at Montreal on Dec 6, 1989. I beg to differ, but the women were not killed simply because they were women. that is now an outdated way of looking at it. It was complicated, and it was about some men having to give up opportunities of the career they dreamed of. Marc Lépine must have been treated badly by women - staff - and feminists to have done what he did.

I know what it's like to not be able to have the career you wanted, because you didn't have enough money, or were too old when you went to university - I was 43 when the killings happened - an undergrad at university. Since then I got my MA and started a PhD, which I did not have enough support for, moneywise. When women go for it, they have to use every resource they can drum up. I was too old to start having to compete with younger women, and could not buy my way into a better position.

I never had a career either, but I did learn to write, and so I write, on Sue's Views on the News. Or at least, I used to write. Now I struggle just to get the healthcare I need, a good part of the time, unsuccessfully. What with women secretaries using their power to make things worse, and doctors probably thinking these women are to be trusted, and seeing no reason to provide care to a 70 year old with no husband, no family nearby to be at appointments with me, that no one is gaining anything worthwhile from, I have been left out. Like Marc Lépine, I have not been treated fairly nor compassionately.

This was not a typical situation of violence against women. Most violence against women happens between a couple who at least know one another and are often married. The killings committed by Marc Lépine were about a man being left behind while feminists prospered.


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Statement by the Prime Minister of Canada on the National Day of Remembrance and Action on Violence Against Women
by Justin Trudeau, Prime Minister of Canada
Ottawa, Ontario: https://pm.gc.ca
December 6, 2016
http://pm.gc.ca/eng/news/2016/12/06/statement-prime-minister-canada-national-day-remembrance-and-action-violence-against 


The Prime Minister, Justin Trudeau, today issued the following statement on the National Day of Remembrance and Action on Violence Against Women:

“Twenty-seven years ago today, 14 young women were murdered at l'École Polytechnique de Montréal simply because they were women.

“On this somber anniversary, let us reflect on what Canadians – women, men, and youth – can do to rid the country and the planet of the scourges of misogyny and gender-based violence.
“The statistics on violence against girls and women are unacceptable. Far too many girls and women, here in Canada and around the world, suffer physical and psychological harm at the hands of others – often people they love and trust.

“On this day – and every day – we recommit ourselves to finding solutions that help prevent future acts of violence. Men and boys are a vital part of the solution to change attitudes and behaviours that allow for this violence to exist. There must be zero tolerance for violence against women, and only with everyone’s support can we build a Canada that is safe for all.

“That is why the Government of Canada is investing in several programs, both in Canada and around the world, to help promote gender equality by supporting education and prevention efforts, as well as helping those who have been targeted by gender-based violence. For example, we will continue to grow and maintain Canada’s network of shelters and transition houses, so no one fleeing domestic violence is left without a place to turn.

“As we mourn today with the families and friends of those bright and talented young women who were victims of that senseless act of hatred, I encourage everyone to think about how their own personal actions matter. Start by joining the conversation online using the hashtag #ActionsMatter. Together we can change minds and stop gender-based violence before it starts.”


4 August 2012

Here Comes the Judge: Lori Douglas (Manitoba)

The inquiry is examining whether Douglas should lose her job because she failed to disclose the matter of the photos and solicitation of sex partners when she was appointed a judge in 2005 (Blackmail risk kept Manitoba judge from prior appointment, July 27, 2012).

That is not the entire purpose of the inquest, but this will be the focus here. Lori Douglas is the name of the lawyer who eventually became a judge in 2005, after at least one attempt previously. Jack King is her husband, whose actions, apparently without her knowing of them, got her into a great deal of trouble. Alex Chapman is the name of the man - the black man – who King attempted to enlist to have sex with his wife, and to whom he showed photos of his naked wife. These are the main players in this scenario, with additional characters consisting of their lawyers and other members of the Judiciary and the legal system – as well as the media, without which we wouldn’t have a story at all. For a brief outline and interesting comments on the case see ‘Testimony expected today from man who complained about Manitoba judge in sexually explicit photos’ (July 16, 2012).

At the end of July, 2012, in the final session before taking a break for several months, until December, 2012, it was revealed that Lori Douglas had previously applied to become a judge, in 2003, before applying and being accepted in 2005 (Blackmail risk kept Manitoba judge, July 27, 2012). The first time, someone at the Judicial Affairs Commission, which was responsible for making the decision about Ms Douglas, discovered that nude pictures had been taken of Douglas and made public.

According to this CBC news article, “Manitoba Chief Justice Marc Monnin opposed Douglas's appointment because of the potential risk of embarrassment and blackmail” though who informed him and whether Ms Douglas knew herself about the photos at this time isn’t clearly stated in the article.

Two years later, when Ms Douglas once again went through the process to become a judge, she was required to disclose on the form if there was anything in her past that might embarrass the Judiciary. This same article (Blackmail risk kept Manitoba judge, July 27, 2012), doesn’t actually state whether she did or did not disclose this on the form, as required. She did, however, apparently have a confidential conversation about it with Margaret Rose Jamieson, executive director of appointments with the the Federal Judicial Affairs Commission (JAC) from 2003 to 2009. Margaret Jamieson, now retired, said she recalls Douglas told her at the time about photos “that may have been provided to someone or posted on the internet.”

Although Manitoba Chief Justice Marc Monnin had opposed Douglas's appointment due to the possible risk of embarrassment and blackmail, he withdrew his opposition in 2005 under the assumption that the photos “had been destroyed and the matter wouldn't resurface.”

Martin Freedman, Manitoba Appeal Court Judge and head of the Judicial Advisory Committee (JAC) in 2005, said that he had heard a few years earlier that photos of the naked Lori Douglas had been posted online, and heard about the sex solicitation, but apparently the original concerns of embarassment and blackmail had ceased to be, and Douglas was made a judge in 2005.

The claim that there was nothing of concern regarding Lori Douglas having anything she should disclose before her selection in 2005 to be a judge seems to be illogical. Supposedly acting on the belief that nothing would be raised that could embarrass the Judiciary, it was decided it was appropriate to make her a judge. And yet the selection process itself was conducted in a secretive manner, with no official form completed by Lori Douglas on which she declares potentially embarrassing events from her past, such as the photos online and the sex solicitation. It was only on the belief of certain officials of the JAC, rather than on the existence of potentially damaging material and events, that the final decision was made.

One very emphatic comment on this subject, of the potential for embarassment of the photos online, comes from ‘G P’, on July 28, 2012, following the article ‘Man. judge disclosed nude photos, inquiry hears’ (July 27, 2012):

“In assuming these photos ceased to exist because Chapman agreed to destroy the ELECTRONIC COPIES sent to him by King, those responsible for vetting Douglas demonstrate a jaw-dropping ignorance of how the Internet operates. The Internet consists of HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS of computers around the world, all interconnected. Setting aside the mail servers used, when someone anywhere in the world, views a webpage, a copy, complete with pictures, is saved (cached) on multiple, intermediate servers, to reduce network latency and congestion. Those intermediate servers (and the path can change from one request to the next) are all backed up daily, as a matter of standard operating procedure. Deleting the photos from the original site has absolutely no effect on these cached and backup copies, reducing King’s hush money agreement with Chapman to absurdity. No custodian of an Internet server outside Canada cares about any pronouncement from a Manitoba judge. When the judge’s husband posted them on the Internet he, albeit unwittingly, put them in the public domain. Further, every viewer of a photo King posted had a copy cached on their local machine, automatically by their web browser, plus anyone who liked what they saw had only to ‘right-click, save’ to overtly preserve it for future enjoyment anytime they like, for as long as they choose. For the sake of brevity, I will simply say King’s distribution of the photos by unencrypted email compounds the number of machines with copies. Why is this an issue and why does it matter? It has been established that the existence of the photos was well known in the legal community, thus it was possible for any client to learn of their existence. If such a client was facing a huge distribution of assets and/or contentious child custody issues in a divorce before Judge Douglas, the fact the photos were thought to be secret for seven years left the judge vulnerable to blackmail from EVERY litigant in her court. To find the photos, one need only visit a few Internet chat rooms and discussion boards, anonymously through a proxy server, placing an ad offering $XXXX to anyone who could retrieve them. Even now, I bet I could get copies of the photos within a week, if the reward I offered was sufficient to arouse interest. Making the payment anonymously, the motivated litigant could send the photos to Judge Douglas by mail, maintaining end-to-end, plausible deniability, in case the blackmail effort should backfire” (GP).

I’m sure most people would agree. Once something is posted to the internet it can never be guaranteed that it will disappear completely. And it is this that makes the decision to allow Lori Douglas to become a judge at all seem naïve, or uncaring of the implications of such secrets having to be kept.

It’s easy to say that a person’s personal sex life is nobody’s business, and that what the judge does has no effect on how well she does her job, but we do live in a society that is governed by people’s conformity to norms. While these have changed greatly over the years, the fact is, they exist.

People might heap praise upon the judge, for example, Vivian Hilder, law prof at the University of Manitoba, who wrote in an email that “Lori's professional reputation in my opinion is that she was a top notch family lawyer, is a good negotiator, was a good choice as a Family Division judge when she was appointed and has been a good judge in the Division to date” (Lori Douglas sex scandal inquiry, July 27, 2012). But is it her ability that is in question, or her credibility?

Even if she is found innocent of any attempt to deceive the JAC, after having such photos of herself displayed and her sexual activities made public, is it possible that she would be treated with respect, by the defendants and witnesses in cases she oversees in the future?

This case is about more than just her sex life being an open book. It’s about women’s sex lives being treated like men’s, even though they’re not the same, and even though photos of naked women are much more profitable and desirable and subject to humiliation and/or reward than photos of naked men.

There’s more of a double standard in this area than any other I can think of, and yet . . . . are we ready for this? In one article, the traumatized Alex Chapman tells how difficult the entire process has been, reminiscent of times when women had trouble having their cases of sexual assault and harassment heard (Manitoba judge sex inquiry called 'bloody coverup,' July 17, 2012.)

Something I have noticed among the general population, is that those who are most sexually active often have a heightened sense of themselves as superior to those who aren’t, and often have little understanding of or appreciation for people who are not sexually active. I am reminded of the abortion movement, which for some time was called the Pro-abortion movement, then changed to ‘pro-choice’ which is what it should be about, with neither side - the pro-choice or pro-life - being ‘better’ than the other.

In a similar way, being sexually liberated shouldn’t automatically mean being sexually active or even actively promoting sex for others. Rather, it should mean being aware of what’s right for you at any given time of your life, and being respectful of others’ choices, limitations, and needs and desires. Unfortunately, life’s not like that.

In the case of the judge Lori Douglas, the Judiciary didn’t disapprove of her sex life. They disapproved of it being made public. So is this an example of a woman gaining favour through her sexual activities, or someone who is being punished because of them? Is a rap on the knuckles enough?

What would a solution look like that was neither of these two – neither a favour nor a punishment? Or could it be both?


Blackmail risk kept Manitoba judge from prior appointment
CBC News
Jul 27, 2012
http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/manitoba/story/2012/07/27/mb-judge-sex-scandal-inquiry-manitoba.html

Lori Douglas sex scandal inquiry: Manitoba judge and husband Jack King known as standout Winnipeg lawyers
By Josh Tapper , Staff Reporter
The Star
July 27, 2012
http://www.thestar.com/news/canada/article/1233159--lori-douglas-sex-scandal-inquiry-manitoba-judge-and-husband-jack-king-known-as-standout-winnipeg-lawyers

Man. judge disclosed nude photos, inquiry hears
The Canadian Press
CTV News
July 27, 2012, updated July 28, 2012
http://www.ctvnews.ca/canada/man-judge-disclosed-nude-photos-inquiry-hears-1.895203

Manitoba judge sex inquiry called 'bloody coverup'
yahoo.com - CBC News
July 17, 2012
http://ca.news.yahoo.com/manitoba-judge-sex-inquiry-gets-tense-171434157.html

Testimony expected today from man who complained about Manitoba judge in sexually explicit photos
The Canadian Press
National Post
July 16, 2012
http://news.nationalpost.com/2012/07/16/testimony-expected-today-from-man-who-complained-about-manitoba-judge-in-sexually-explicit-photos


Additional sources

Canada’s Bondage Judge Faces Judicial Inquiry This Month
By Georgialee Lang
O.Canada.com
May 2, 2012
http://o.canada.com/2012/05/02/canadas-bondage-judge-faces-judicial-inquiry-this-month-2/

Jack King falls on his sword over nude photos of judge wife - plus comments
By Christie Blatchford
National Post Full Comment
July 24, 2012
http://fullcomment.nationalpost.com/2012/07/24/christie-blatchford-jack-king-falls-on-his-sword-over-nude-photos-of-judge-wife/

Judge sex controversy lawsuit quashed
Nov 16, 2010
CBC News
http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/manitoba/story/2010/11/16/mb-lawsuit-judge-sex-photos-winnipeg.html

Manitoba judge upfront about nude photos when screened for bench, judge testifies
Winnipeg — The Canadian Press
Globe and Mail
July 27, 2012
http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/national/manitoba-judge-upfront-about-nude-photos-when-screened-for-bench-judge-testifies/article4444288/

Man. judge disclosed nude photos, inquiry hears
The Canadian Press
July 27, 2012, last updated July 28, 2012
http://www.ctvnews.ca/canada/man-judge-disclosed-nude-photos-inquiry-hears-1.895203

Man says he never talked sex with Manitoba judge in naked photos case
Steve Lambert, The Canadian Press
The Star
July 17, 2012
http://www.thestar.com/news/canada/article/1227675--complainant-says-he-never-talked-sex-with-manitoba-judge-in-naked-photos-case

Manitoba judge sex inquiry called 'bloody coverup'
yahoo.com - CBC News
July 17, 2012
http://ca.news.yahoo.com/manitoba-judge-sex-inquiry-gets-tense-171434157.html

Nude photo controversy was 'well-known' in Manitoba's legal community, husband says
By Steve Lambert
Winnipeg — The Canadian Press
Globe and Mail
July 25, 2012
http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/national/nude-photo-controversy-was-well-known-in-manitobas-legal-community-husband-says/article4440460/

Photos of Manitoba judge beyond sadness
By Heather Mallick, Columnist
The Star
July 24, 2012
http://www.thestar.com/news/canada/article/1231212--mallick-photos-of-manitoba-judge-beyond-sadness

Testimony expected today from man who complained about Manitoba judge in sexually explicit photos plus comments
The Canadian Press
National Post
July 16, 2012
http://news.nationalpost.com/2012/07/16/testimony-expected-today-from-man-who-complained-about-manitoba-judge-in-sexually-explicit-photos

13 August 2010

Cory McMullan: Belleville police chief victim of a violent incident

Belleville, Ontario, police Chief Cory McMullan suffered a broken arm in an incident one week ago. She says she was the victim of domestic violence, but it is likely that it was simply an 'incident,' using police terms, and not the kind of violence against women that so many women in society have to endure, due to powerlessness in their home circumstances. One has to wonder what her retired 53-year old husband has experienced himself, in this new kind of society where men are more likely to leave work early, while the wife continues the family career.

Mrs McMullan apparently stated that, "given her position in the community, 'it is important to acknowledge that I am the victim' " (Belleville police chief victim, CBC, Aug 11, 2010). But it may well have been that there were two victims in this case. It is hard to believe that the husband, retired police officer Dave McMullen, would use violence intentionally to try to control his police chief wife. If this was a situation of domestic violence, it wasn't the traditional kind that many wives experienced before they gained financial independence in their lives.

In my comment submitted to the CBC online article, at 8:53 am ET Aug 13, I wrote the following:

Eliza Doolittle writes, "I suggest we wait until the other side of the story is told before jumping to any conclusions."

The problem here is that her arm got broken, and in our society, that kind of violence is usually the deciding factor in any cases of abuse. Psychological, emotional, sexual, or economic abuse is less likely to be recognized, particularly as is applies to men being victimized. Our society has changed so much in the last 30 or 40 years, with women often working past the time when their husbands retire. We don't know the situation here, but we do know how difficult it can be for any man who retires at an early age. The woman, Cory McMullan, has apparently stated, "it is important to acknowledge that I am the victim." Like many women of today, and men of yesteryear, it may be difficult for her to see that there might be another side to the story.
END OF COMMENT


Belleville Police Chief speaks out as a domestic abuse victim
By Natalie Stechyson and Adrian Morrow, Toronto and Belleville
Globe and Mail
Aug. 12, 2010
http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/national/ontario/belleville-police-chief-speaks-out-as-a-domestic-abuse-victim/article1671473/

Belleville police chief victim of 'domestic incident'
The Canadian Press
CBC News
August 11, 2010
http://www.cbc.ca/canada/ottawa/story/2010/08/11/ot-belleville-chief.html

Belleville’s abuzz over police chief as victim of domestic violence
By Carola Vyhnak, Staff Reporter
Toronto Star
Aug 12, 2010
http://www.thestar.com/news/ontario/article/846418--belleville-s-abuzz-over-police-chief-as-victim-of-domestic-violence

Domestic Violence’ narratives: the murders of Lois Mordue and Dave Lucio
By Sue McPherson
Sue's Views on the News
June 9, 2010
http://suemcpherson.blogspot.com/2010/06/domestic-violence-narratives-murders-of.html

Ontario police chief says she was victim of domestic abuse
By QMI Agency
canoe.ca
Aug 11, 2010
http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/Canada/2010/08/11/14989296.html

Public life, public victim
By Joseph Brean
Financial Post
Aug. 12, 2010
http://www.financialpost.com/related/topics/Public+life+public+victim/3388045/story.html
no longer available through this link


Added Aug 24, 2010

Belleville Mayor denies affair with police chief
Carola Vyhnak, Urban Affairs Reporter
Toronto Star
Aug 23 2010
http://www.thestar.com/news/gta/article/851519--belleville-mayor-denies-affair-with-police-chief?bn=1

Belleville mayor denies having affair with police chief
By W. Brice McVicar, QMI Agency
Peterborough Examiner
Aug 24, 2010
http://www.thepeterboroughexaminer.com/ArticleDisplay.aspx?e=2726196

Belleville mayor denies rumours of affair with police chief
By Adrian Morrow, Belleville
Globe and Mail
Aug. 23, 2010
http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/national/ontario/belleville-mayor-denies-rumours-of-affair-with-police-chief/article1682780/
available online through Globe&Mail

links updated April 11, 2012

3 July 2010

Men's rights versus children's safety: BA deals with the possibility of perverts

BA Airline has been in a spot of trouble for its handling of a delicate social issue. My response here is mainly to the National Post article on the subject - 'You’re male. You must be a pervert,' by Barbara Kay.

I almost didn't respond to this in the section following the article, but I did, in response to another commenter, then got drawn into the topic of discussion - men's rights versus children's. I found the title to be unsettling - an exaggeration of a social problem men don't like to discuss.

I thought this was worthy of telling about here as it is an example of men who cannot see beyond their own needs and their own egos.

It was also an example of how women (one woman - Barbara Kay) can dismiss anyone else's concerns in order that her favourite cause - men's rights - be upheld. I say, Good for the airline for doing what they can to protect children travelling alone!

Finally, it is an example of how rules should not always be followed blindly (though they are good as guidlelines, in certain circumstances, letting them go is best for everyone). There can be extentuating circumstances which following the rules leading. (I know; I came to Oshawa as a stranger and was treated like a criminal, a threat, as someone worthy only of second-class treatment, or less, often by people doing their jobs which means followng the rules without thought.) In this case, the man had been travelling with his pregnant wife and they had switched seats so that she could be more comfortable by the window. The flight attendant was either unable or unwilling to consider the situation in its entirety. He ordered the man back to his original seat.

According to the Daily Mail, the male passenger said "I was made to feel like a criminal in front of other passengers. It was totally humiliating. Neither myself or my wife dared to speak to the boy in case the cabin crew forced us from our seats. The poor child must have thought we were extremely rude and unfriendly."

The male traveller backed off, which was the only thing he could do without looking like a - well - pervert, demanding to be seated next to the unaccompanied child. He did the right thing, and was recompensed for it later, so I fail to see why the situation is still being treated as problematic. The rule itself was not the problem, but the way the situation was handled. He was lucky to be able to sue and recieve justice. There are many people in this world - in Canada - who get treated badly every single day, who dare not speak for fear they will be punished, or who get blamed for anything bad that happens.

The discussion itself raised another issue, of conflicting rights. Sometimes, one person's rights (or one group's) can be stepped on by another person (or group) demanding theirs. In the discussion following the article, one of the commenters argued that if he had been accosted by airline staff about sitting next to an unaccompanied child he would have loudly complained then and there that he was being discriminated against, for being a man, or as news articles have put it - a pervert. Quite a lesson for the boy travelling alone to have to contend with. The male passenger did the only thing he could - he backed off, and was able to sue later.

My final comment on the National Post article was one I had submitted earlier in the discussion but which had been ignored, the commenter accusing me of being a "feminist propagandist" and needing a psychiatrist. So I will leave readers with this.

"I don't know how much feminists have had to do with such rules being created, but there has been increased awareness in society of how boys and girls can be taken advantage of, sexually, when they are left in close quarters with men who are sexual predators. Do you have a better way that the airline can deal with this?" (Sue McP)

Added June, 2012

Another good article explaining the fiaso is one by Dhruti Shah (BA seat policy, 2010). And finally, BA announces a change in policy! (Mirko Fischer winds again, 2010). A third piece, posted onto a Men’s equality website, is included, even though I think their perspective needs to be a bit broader than simply seeking ‘equality’ (Mirko Fisher is a men’s equality hero, 2010).

I have often said and will continue to say, about feminists, and now about men’s rights activists, that there never can be complete equality. Women need to listen to men’s concerns, and men need to listen to women’s (looking at it from a gender perspective.) Rules are made, or decisions made, then something comes up that puts the rule into question, and further adjustments are made. That’s how it works. And I see this case as being an example of that process. I imagine the people who made that policy weren’t doing it to intentionally embarrass men or make flying more difficult, or to lose customers. They were just thinking of the children.


BA seat policy made man 'feel like a child molester'
By Dhruti Shah
BBC News
June 24, 2010
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/10182869

Businessman sues BA 'for treating men like perverts'
By Sophie Borland
Daily Mail UK
Jan 16, 2010
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1243625/Businessman-Mirko-Fischer-sues-British-Airwars-treating-men-like-perverts.html

Mirko Fisher is a men’s equality hero as British Airways continues its sexism against men
Posted by Skimmington
The Rights of Man
June 25, 2010
http://therightsofman.typepad.co.uk/the_rights_of_man/2010/06/mirko-fischer-is-a-mens-equality-hero-as-british-airways-continues-its-sexism-against-men-1.html

Mirko Fischer wins again
By NB, Washington, DC
The Economist, Gulliver
Aug 22, 2010
http://www.economist.com/blogs/gulliver/2010/08/british_airways_seating_policy

You’re male. You must be a pervert
By Barbara Kay
National Post Full Comment
July 2, 2010
http://fullcomment.nationalpost.com/2010/07/02/barbara-kay-youre-male-you-must-be-a-pervert/#more-5616

Links updated June 2012

9 June 2010

Domestic Violence’ narratives: the murders of Lois Mordue and Dave Lucio

'Violence against women' came to be a women's issue when feminists realized the term for violence between intimate partners - 'domestic violence' - did not acknowledge the differences from men that women who were abused experienced in their relationships. I first learned about this in the mid-eighties, doing women's studies at university, at UWO in London, Ontario. Since then, the subject of violence in relationships has arisen once more, in the context of two separate homicides, first of Lois Mordue, second, that of Dave Lucio, both of whom had been in an intimate relationship with their killer.

In 2005, I read about the homicide of Lois Mordue on August 8, 2005, had taken place in my hometown, Woodstock, Ontario. At that time I wrote letters to the editor of the Sentinel Review in response to the articles, giving my own views on the murder and on the subject of domestic violence in general. As time went on, I saw that it was being referred to as domestic homicide, woman abuse, and domestic violence, as Robert Alexander, Lois Mordue’s brother, increasingly became involved, claiming that “violence against women won’t stop until both sexes are involved.” (Moving forward, April 19, 2007).

More recently, an article in the National Post (Myths of Domestic Violence, June 2, 2010) brought to my attention another case of homicide, of Dave Lucio, in London, Ontario, on June 6, 2007, which may or may not have been ‘domestic violence.’ A second article reinforced the idea that Doug Lucio, the father of the victim, was referring to the killing of his son as domestic violence (Lucio vigil, June 7, 2010). “Violence is violence, whether it’s men or women. There is no difference” he was quoted as saying. Once again, I felt compelled to write in, to the comments section of the article, as much of what I was hearing, just did not ring true to me.

To summarize, these were two homicides, one male, one female, both killed by individuals with whom they were in intimate relationships but both of which had ended before the murders took place. In the Mordue case, one article refers to the victim's brother, stating "While the Crown prosecutes an alleged domestic homicide, Alexander is trying to find some answers to why domestic violence is happening." (In Honour, Dec 28, 2005). Doug Lucio, the father of Dave Lucio, the male homicide victim, not happy at the way the Police handled the murder case, has been quoted as saying, "there needs to be more equal treatment in cases of domestic violence" (Vigil, June 6, 2010).

Controversy surrounds the Dave Lucio/ Kelly Johnson murder-suicide, apparently due to the neglect of Chief Faulkner to name this a 'domestic' homicide (Myths, June 2, 2010). Erland Mordue, however, was apparently alleged to have committed 'domestic' homicide (In Honour, Dec 28, 2005), although whether that stuck or made any difference to local statistics is not known to me. As it happens, Erland had intended to kill himself also, making that a murder-suicide, but failed in his attempt. He was convicted of first-degree murder and is now serving his sentence.

Both these men - Doug Lucio and Robert Alexander - have turned to domestic violence narratives as a means of dealing with the trauma of the violent deaths of their family members. Yet I wonder how well the circumstances of the cases fit into any version of this narrative. The term narrative is used to suggest a theme, a cultural understanding or norm that is accepted in society as a way of explaining a social phenomenon. When survivors ask themselves Why?, they seek some kind of explanation, and domestic violence is a term that adapts fairly easily to a number of different situations. But I wonder how good the fit is.

Cases that are placed in this category due to the fact they immediately fulfil a basic definition of domestic violence will become subject to the wider implications of domestic violence - domestic abuse, for one, or 'violence against women', the kind of situation women have had to endure historically as the second-class person in the relationship.

Killing one's intimate partner might well be seen as an example of domestic abuse to the extreme - violence resulting in death. But if the relationship had not been abusive earlier, does the end result of murder make it fit the description, on looking back?

If one believes that power has a lot to do with it, and that abuse only happens if one partner has control over the other - financially, emotionally, psychologically, sexually - is it possible to determine whether or not the victims had previously been abused in their relationship, forced to comply with the wishes of the abusing partner? Seeing the misuse of power as the underlying basis of an abusive relationship, we can ask whether the perpetrator of violence, as seen by investigators, might actually be the partner fighting back from their position of powerlessness against a more subtle or insidious form of domestic abuse. Sometimes only the ones involved know whether coercion or other forms of abuse were being used as a means of control. If the killer had also planned to die, making it a murder-suicide, does that change the way they are viewed, as victims as well as victimizers?

Dying a violent death doesn't mean one has been a victim of domestic violence, except in a very narrow meaning - a police definition, or a statistic to be included in a particular set of stats. But on its own it isn't proof that the victim was in an abusive relationship. If domestic violence is used as an excuse - a reason for a murder taking place, the real reason it happened might not be being recognized. So when the victims are happy, fulfilled, independent and financially secure, and not noticeably vulnerable, one could look to other reasons for problems in the relationship and the end result of murder.

Violence against women came to be a feminist cause because any woman who was vulnerable in her relationship was at risk of being subjected to controlling, abusive behaviour from her partner if he didn't know how to act with maturity in the relationship, or chose not to. If not financially independent or holding down a job it might be difficult for her to leave. Now, in Canadian society, more women are working and able to support themselves. Staying in an abusive relationship would no longer be necessary if the man wasn't agreeable to changing abusive behaviour. Hence we have such programs as the White Ribbon Campaign and Changing Ways, for men.

The other side of violence against women has now turned out to be the growth of men's groups aimed at assisting men who are the victims of women's acts of violence in their intimate relationships. If this was a problem previously, it received virtually no attention, but since the growth of the women's movement, and possibly due to increasing numbers of women gaining financial independence and working outside the home, some men have become vulnerable to abuse by their female partners. The pendulum has swung from one side completely over to the other. Thus, as well as groups and programs geared towards assisting women in particular, there are now the same kinds of groups, etc, formed to assist men. One emphasis of such groups is on the legal side of it. Where once women needed feminist lawyers to comprehend and fight for their rights, now men need to have lawyers who can understand the issues addressing their particular circumstances.

But even where there is no abuse, unresolveable relationship problems happen. Not all problems get to be labelled abuse even if they are. If Kelly Johnson hadn't killed herself after killing Dave Lucio, no doubt she would have ended up serving time for murder. But it still would not have meant that Dave Lucio had been a victim of domestic violence, except in the narrowest sense of the term, apparently used in Police Department stats, according to Barbara Kay (London, Jan 28, 2010). Although the definition of domestic violence used by the London Police Dept indicates that a single act of violence by one spouse towards the other constitutes domestic violence, as well as multiple incidents, I wouldn't agree. One incident might be an indication that an abusive relationship has begun, or it might simply be one isolated incident.

There was no indication that the relationship between Dave Lucio and Kelly Johnson had been abusive. The 12-page report (Report, 2008) put out by the London Police Department does not suggest that the relationship between Dave Lucio and Kelly Johnson was characterized by domestic violence. That the two were both members of the London Police Department obviously has made a difference to the way their relationship and deaths were perceived. But any omissions or errors in judgment made by Police Chief Faulkner, or favouritism in treatment of his officers, cannot change that aspect of the relationship between the two involved in the murder-suicide, that it did not involve systematic abuse. One spouse committing adultery, making unreasonable demands regarding sex, work, community activity and friendships, spending, and /or committing repeated physical acts of abuse, are the kinds of behaviour that make a relationship abusive, not the extreme act of homicide only.

In one of the first newspaper articles, it was stated that there was no history of abuse between the Mordues (Murder investigation, Aug 11, 2005). Later, however, it was implied that Erland Mordue was abusive, at least on one occasion, the week before he killed his wife Lois, phoning her several times, according to Lois’s new boyfriend, Zeke Postma, so that he offered to drive her to the Police Station to get a restraining order (Tears flow, April 05, 2007). A separate article mentions what is possibly related to that same incident, one of information-gathering’ the only one on record (Mordue wrote, March 28, 2007). The suggestion is that Erland Mordue was an abusive, controlling husband, creating a threatening, unhappy environment for his wife who was powerless to change her circumstances and leave. Luckily, Lois was not affected greatly by his treatment of her and quickly began a fulfilling life, with a job she enjoyed, a new home purchased for her by her son, and a new boyfriend, resulting in a questionable assessment that she had ever been a victim of abuse during her relationship with Erland Mordue. Abuse generally has an affect on the one being abused. But Lois appears to have been a well-adjusted person (Mordue’s zest for life, Aug 12, 2005). Normally, if a person is lacking family or community support, the potential for abuse is greater.

The world is filled with abuse and violence. Abuse affects a person's psyche, but how can we tell if it's due to the pitfalls of everyday life, of doing a difficult job, unthoughtful colleagues or an uncaring community, or illness, isolation, unfulfilled dreams, or fear of the future?

There was some resistance from women’s advocates and local citizens to Erland Mordue being allowed out on bail, due to his propensity towards cold-bloodedly planning murder, apparently (Mordue granted bail, Feb 13, 2006; Justice System, Feb 28, 2006; Erland Mordue, Sept 19, 2006). But if it is being argued that Erland was guilty of domestic homicide, of murdering someone he was in an intimate relationship with, then that would reduce the likelihood of him committing further acts of violence while out on bail. Women’s activists seem to want men who kill women they are in relationships with to be treated the same as any other murderer (Debunking stereotypes, Mar 13, 2006), though I argued against that line of reasoning (Murder cases, Mar 22, 06). However, it does appear, from the murder-suicide case in London, that treating cases individually instead of generalizing towards them, regarding granting bail, for instance, might be a more compassionate approach. Had Kelly Johnson lived, I wonder if she would have been treated the same as Erland Mordue was. As it is, Kelly Johnson is being pictured as a troubled woman, rather than as a cold-hearted killer.

The references listed below, which are those I have mentioned in this article, are included in the longer Bibliography list, which will be available on my website but not on my blog. For readers interested in this subject of domestic violence, Statistics Canada provides online a document on Violence Against Women (see Measuring violence, 2006), which provides valuable information that goes beyond the purely physical aspects of domestic violence, and that may also be of interest to men who are victims. The Comments sections of some newspaper articles can provide insight from everyday readers in the community and not just journalists. Local news articles about the Mordue case may be available through the archives of the newspaper if no working link is available. Links to letters I wrote to the Sentinel Review - Compassion (2007), Murder cases (2006) and Domestic violence (2005) - are also included here. Academic Jessica Eckstein has done some relevant work in the area of abuse and intimate relationships, a link provided below to one on men who experience violence from women (Masculinity of Men, 2010). Lastly, by chance, an article just out now announces a program intended to help women become aware of abuse in their relationship, apparently, though it does make one wonder, not just about the controlling effect it will have on how women will start to think of themselves, routinely, but the effect on men in their lives (Groundbreaking, June 2010).


List of References

Compassion and Humanity (Response to 'Guilty', S-R, Apr 13, 2007, and 'Society . . . humanity', S-R, Apr 18, 2007)
By Sue McPherson
Letter to the Editor
Woodstock Sentinel Review
submitted April 20, 2007
http://samcpherson.homestead.com/files/LetterstoEditors/2007AprCompassionandHumanity.doc

Debunking stereotypes
By Susan Houston
Letter to the Editor
Woodstock Sentinel-Review
Mar 13, 2006
http://www.woodstocksentinelreview.com/ArticleDisplay.aspx?archive=true&e=2083927 Link unavailable
http://samcpherson.homestead.com/files/Miscellaneous/2010_Mar_DebunkingStereotypes.doc

Domestic Violence: the Mordues (Response to 'In Honour of Lois', S-R, Dec 28, 2005)
By Sue McPherson
Letter to the Editor, submitted Dec 28, 2005
Woodstock Sentinel Review
http://samcpherson.homestead.com/files/LetterstoEditors/2005DecDomesticViolenceMordue.doc

Erland Mordue back in jail
Woodstock Sentinel-Review
Sept 19, 2006
http://www.woodstocksentinelreview.com/ArticleDisplay.aspx?archive=true&e=2085150 Link not available
http://samcpherson.homestead.com/files/Miscellaneous/2006_Sept_ErlandMordueBackJail.doc

Family Violence in Canada: a Statistical Profile
Canadian Centre for Justice Statistics
2000
http://www.statcan.gc.ca/pub/85-224-x/85-224-x2000000-eng.pdf

‘Groundbreaking’ project helps abused women
By Kate Dubinski
The London Free Press
June 8, 2010
http://www.lfpress.com/news/london/2010/06/08/14314781.html

In honour of Lois
By Jon Willing
Woodstock Sentinel-Review
December 28, 2005
http://www.woodstocksentinelreview.com/ArticleDisplay.aspx?archive=true&e=2083435 Link not working
http://samcpherson.homestead.com/files/Miscellaneous/2005_Dec_InHonourofLois.doc

Justice system in need of change
unnamed author
Letter to the editor
Woodstock Sentinel Review
Feb 28, 2006
http://www.woodstocksentinelreview.com/ArticleDisplay.aspx?archive=true&e=2083832 Link not available
http://samcpherson.homestead.com/files/Miscellaneous/2006_Feb_JusticeSystemNeedChange.doc

Lucio vigil meant to draw awareness to domestic violence
By Geoff Turner
The London Free Press
June 7, 2010
http://www.lfpress.com:80/news/london/2010/06/05/14280126.html
http://samcpherson.homestead.com/files/Miscellaneous/2010_June_LucioVigilMeantToDrawAwarenessDV.doc

London, Ontario Police statistics on domestic violence show classic signs of abuse
By Barbara Kay
National Post, Full Comment
January 28, 2010
http://network.nationalpost.com/np/blogs/fullcomment/archive/2010/01/28/barbara-kay-london-ontario-police-statistics-on-domestic-violence-show-classic-signs-of-abuse.aspx Link no longer working
http://oped.ca/National-Post/barbara-kay-london-ontario-police-statistics-on-domestic-violence-show-classic-signs-of-abuse/

Masculinity of Men Communicating Abuse Victimization
By Jessica Eckstein
Western Connecticut State University
2010
http://www.ncdsv.org/images/Eckstein_MasculinityOfMenCommunicatingAbuseVictimization_5-5-2010.pdf
http://samcpherson.homestead.com/files/Miscellaneous/MaleVictimizationEck.pdf

Measuring violence against women
Statistical Trends 2006
http://www.statcan.gc.ca/pub/85-570-x/85-570-x2006001-eng.pdf

Mordue granted bail
Woodstock Sentinel Review
Feb 13, 2006
http://www.woodstocksentinelreview.com/ArticleDisplay.aspx?archive=true&e=2083731 Link no longer works
http://samcpherson.homestead.com/files/Miscellaneous/2006_Feb_Mordue_Granted_Bail.doc

Mordue’s zest for life never surprised family
Woodstock Sentinel-Review
Aug 12, 2005
http://www.woodstocksentinelreview.com/ArticleDisplay.aspx?archive=true&e=2082573 Link no longer available
http://samcpherson.homestead.com/files/Miscellaneous/2005_Aug_MorduesZestForLife.doc

Mordue 'wrote it all down in letters'
By Carla Garrett
Woodstock Sentinel Review
March 28, 2007
http://www.woodstocksentinelreview.com/ArticleDisplay.aspx?archive=true&e=2086560 Link no longer works
http://samcpherson.homestead.com/files/Miscellaneous/2007_Mar_MordueWroteItAllDown.doc

Moving forward
By Carla Garrett
Woodstock Sentinel Review
April 19, 2007
http://www.woodstocksentinelreview.com/ArticleDisplay.aspx?archive=true&e=2086746 Link not available
http://samcpherson.homestead.com/files/Miscellaneous/2007Apr19_MovingForward.doc

Murder cases must be handled differently (Response to Debunking Stereotypes, Mar 13, 2006)
By Sue McPherson
Letter to the Editor
Woodstock Sentinel Review
March 22, 2006
http://samcpherson.homestead.com/files/LetterstoEditors/2006MarMurderCasesResponsetoDebunkingStereotypes.doc

Murder investigation continues
Woodstock Sentinel-Review
Aug 11, 2005
http://www.woodstocksentinelreview.com/ArticleDisplay.aspx?archive=true&e=2082563 Link no longer available
http://samcpherson.homestead.com/files/Miscellaneous/2005_Aug_MurderInvestigationContinues.doc

Myths of domestic violence
By Barbara Kay
National Post, Full Comment
June 2, 2010
http://fullcomment.nationalpost.com/2010/06/02/myths-of-domestic-violence/#more-2377

Report to the deaths of David Lucio and Kelly Johnson
By Antoon Leenaars, Peter Collins, and Deborah Sinclair
for London Police Dept
May 28, 2008
Report-to-the-london-police-service-and-london-community
http://www.police.london.ca/Newsroom/PDFs/luciojohnsonreport.pdf

Tears flow at Mordue trial
By Carla Garrett
Woodstock Sentinel Review
April 05, 2007
http://www.woodstocksentinelreview.com/News/298996.html broken link
http://www.woodstocksentinelreview.com/ArticleDisplay.aspx?archive=true&e=2086649 link unavailable
http://samcpherson.homestead.com/files/Miscellaneous/2007_Apr_TearsFlow.doc

Vigils marks Lucio death
By Geoff Turner
The London Free Press
June 6, 2010
http://samcpherson.homestead.com/files/Miscellaneous/2010JuneVigilsMarksLucioDeath.doc


Links updated Apr 12, 2012

See also, for further information, the bibliography following 'Domestic Violence Narratives' at http://samcpherson.homestead.com/files/EssaysandWriting/2010_June_DomesticViolenceNarrativesRefBiblio.doc